November 10th
An ode to Ted Berrigan
Martin Luther… 1483…
Sparked a reformation,
turning the world upside down.
Josh Peck… 1986…
The step-brother that
idolized Oprah and screamed
“Megan!”
Germany… 1939…
Night of the Broken Glass.
Night of a broken people.
Winston Churchill… 1942…
A speech that signified
“the end
of the new beginning.”
The step-brother that
idolized Oprah and screamed
“Megan!”
Germany… 1939…
Night of the Broken Glass.
Night of a broken people.
Winston Churchill… 1942…
A speech that signified
“the end
of the new beginning.”
Miranda Lambert… 1983…
The country girl
whose house built her
a Grammy.
Sesame Street… 1969…
Children engrossed with
The country girl
whose house built her
a Grammy.
Sesame Street… 1969…
Children engrossed with
a yellow bird
on a new media platform.
Vietnamization… 1970…
One week of
no war
no hate.
Just peace.
Bill Gates… 1983…
The man who forged
a new window
on a new media platform.
Vietnamization… 1970…
One week of
no war
no hate.
Just peace.
Bill Gates… 1983…
The man who forged
a new window
of technology.
Berlin… 1989…
A wall collapsed,
fifty years after the mass destruction
of a nation
Me… 1995…
Who do I aspire to be?
Berlin… 1989…
A wall collapsed,
fifty years after the mass destruction
of a nation
Me… 1995…
Who do I aspire to be?
I love the structure of this poem. I think you made really clever choices with picking the subjects of each stanza. It's very engaging. I also love the descriptions under each name/subject. They are very clear, and evoke a lot of emotion. I also really like how you switch off from very intense, revolutionary events, to ones more simple, and personal (josh peck, and sesame street). I didn't think that the Ellen Pompeo stanza was so necessary, or significant. It didn't add anything to the poem.
ReplyDeleteI love the last line. All of a sudden, the poem directs towards you. All of these people and placed are remembered for something, and now it's your turn to make that mark on the world. Really clever.
I love the structure of this poem, and the end is amazing. It's so simple yet so deep. I also noticed how there are no end punctuation marks accept in the last stanza. It's almost like they wrote their stories and life moved on but now it's stopped at you and it's your turn to tell your story. One small thing, most of the stanzas are in past tense but there are a couple that are in present tense.
ReplyDeleteUntil the last line, I was wondering where it was that you were going with this. It all seemed pretty random and impersonal but I like that you tied it all in to you and what mark you'll make on the world. I think the you could have chosen a better word than "flipping" in the first stanza and the line, "that we all know and love" is isolating to those of us who may not know so maybe replace that line altogether. Overall I really like the simplicity of it.
ReplyDeleteI love the end of the poem. It ties the poem together rather than making it about random but significant events. I tend to make the mistake myself of switching between past and present tense and I think you may have done the same here. Other than that, I really enjoyed it.
ReplyDeleteReally interesting idea! I agree with above comments about sticking to tenses (we've all been there and continue to be there). I wonder how you chose the events you chose- is there something linking them beyond global significance? I also love how you brought yourself in- but I think you could use more powerful language than "who am I going to be"- the rest of the poem is more sophisticated than that line, so you want to continue that thread. Overall really cool use of style and simplicity!
ReplyDeleteThis is really cool! I love that you juxtapose these major world events with the birth of an individual-- and event that I would venture to say is no less important, but may often be thought of as so. With the last line, I would love something even more simple, like "Me… 1995… a poet is born." or something a little bit less telling and more showing. Thank you for sharing!!
ReplyDeleteI like the idea behind this poem a lot, and I feel it is at it's best when the poet is dealing with big historical issues so swiftly and concisely. It's exciting to cover so much ground in history with such speed. I don't need to know just where I am going, because I am liking the ride along the way.
ReplyDeleteI didn't like the presence of Miranda Lambert and Josh Peck in the poem. I wondered why the poet chose in include relatively trivial celebrities while mainly dealing with major historical figures. I mean, I could imagine a poem that humorously juxtaposes today's latest celebrities with major historical figures, but that doesn't seem to be going on here.
I'm with Judy about the ending. I know a lot of people liked it, but to me, it ties the poem up with a bow and renders it a neat little package. I like it better without the summary statement that TELL US what the poem means. For me, poems are at their best when I DISCOVER what they mean, rather than being told. I thrill to the pleasure of those "Aha!" moments when I realize something that had been a mystery. That's why my preference is for poems that do not end so neatly. I like poems that leave me thinking.
I DO like getting personal at the end. What about finishing with a stanza that is parallel to the others? I would love to see you omit your current last line and instead finish that stanza in the pattern of the previous ones, using specific details to bring to life the position of the speaker and the awe and wonder of our own particular place in history.